Gratitude and humility are said to be the antidote to superiority. The more grateful we are the more humble we become, and the more humble we become the more grateful we are.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

My mantra is: Humble yourself. Discover what your monsters are. Be honest with yourself. Terry Crews

I’m reading “High-Performance Habits” by Brendon Burchard. I set it aside to read something else and now I am finishing it. I’ve come to a section called High-Performance Killers beware of three traps, superiority, dissatisfaction, and neglect.

We’ve all met jerks who thought they were all that, maybe we’ve been accused of being those jerks, thinking we are better than others. Isn’t it true that sometimes we do think we are better than others, we don’t even think we are doing it in the wrong way, but just because we don’t think we are rubbing our success in other people’s faces doesn’t mean they don’t feel we are.

I haven’t figured out if it is worse to think if people tried a little harder they could have a better life, or think they aren’t capable of better, they are doing the best they can. We must watch that bigotry of low expectations doesn’t creep into our thoughts and an air of superiority in our heads.

Yesterday, I went to Dollarama and someone was asking for money outside of the store. I don’t know how to handle this. Should I give when I can to help someone in need? Should I at least ask to hear their story and decide then? I didn’t do either of those, I walked on by. Firstly, I just heard on the radio the city of Windsor, Ontario is talking about banning begging on their downtown streets, it is becoming a problem residents are complaining about. I don’t want to see begging become a common occurrence where I live but is that a lack of empathy? Am I wrong to believe we have social support for people, and begging is not necessary here in Canada?

I listen to Thomas Sowell talk about how in his opinion, (he’s an American economist) welfare has destroyed the family and made women rely on the government welfare check instead of a husband and father to help provide for the family, to the detriment of everyone, but especially children.

I often ask my husband, what does help look like? When are we enabling people to not do for themselves and calling it helping, and when are we not giving assistance to help someone elevate themselves? Right now I hear employers are having a hard time finding workers. If there is work out there to be had, most people won’t think people need to beg if they can get a job.

Superiority draws us in an inch at a time. If we think we are better than another person or group, that is a form of superiority we all understand. If we feel we are so amazingly good we don’t need feedback, guidance, diverse viewpoints, or support that is superiority. If we think we automatically deserve respect because of who we are, our position, or our accomplishments we are feeling superior. It is the last one on Brendon Burchard’s list of knowing when superiority has reared its head that surprised me.

There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. Good pride represents our dignity and self-respect. Bad pride is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance. John Maxwell

He tells us superiority has reared its head when we feel people don’t understand us, our fights and failures aren’t our faults, “they” can’t appreciate our situation, the demands, obligations, or what we face every day.

He also tells us that all isolation is ultimately self-imposed. This can be hard to accept when we feel no one understands our situation. We need to abandon our sense of separateness even in truly difficult situations. We may think we are the only ones to face something terrible, but we are not.

Sometimes we need to look for support groups of others that are facing the same situations. Other people will not understand us better when we stay silent, and yet we have to watch too much “poor me” coming out in our conversations.  When we feel trapped in hardship, we may feel no one understands but we need to be willing to give people a chance, and not put our prickly selves out there. By trying to protect ourselves we end up more isolated and alone.

We are all students of life, no matter where we are on the path there is still a lot to learn. We will never master everything, and there is something we can learn from everyone we meet. Brendon Burchard tells us gratitude and humility are the antidotes to superiority. The more grateful we are the more humble we feel, and the more humble we feel the more grateful we are.

Can we live our lives achieving everything we want or at least attempting to and be grateful, humble, effective, and respectful?

First, I’ve rarely met a high performer who thinks they’re “at the top.” Most feel like they are just getting started. Brendon Burchard

Humility is the surest sign of strength. Thomas Merton

The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly. Jim Rohn

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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